Saturday, September 06, 2008

Goodbye Nikki


Hey TransGriot readers,
As y'all know I've been dealing with the untimely death of a friend over the last few days and just got back home an hour ago from Nikki's service.

I was pleased to not only see the overflow crowd of Nikki's friends and family, we even had besides yours truly, the Louisville transgender and GLB community there in full effect.

It was hard looking at Nikki peacefully sleeping in that white casket realizing she died a few months short of her 30th birthday. There were more than a few tears shed, but simmering under the surface this morning was anger. Anger over the way she was taken from us and anger over the disrespectful way the story was covered by the local media.

BTW, had a chat with GLAAD about that. Will keep y'all updated as to what they're hearing from WLKY and WDRB about it.

The service was a combined wake and funeral that started at 9 AM EDT with the funeral portion starting precisely at 11 AM EDT. They kept the service on a tight schedule, so unfortunately people weren't allowed to speak.

During Rev. Barry Washington's eulogy he talked about love and how it is the binding force that keeps this world from tearing itself apart. He also talked about the love that was in that room.

I was struck by the fact that we had an interesting contrast of people in there. Nikki's family and friends, the GLBT community, and her mother's U of L coworkers.

It was also interesting to note that the transwomen were dressed conservatively church service stylish, while some of the biowomen in the room were wearing jeans and t-shirts.

After the service I went home. I decided not to go to the cemetery. I'd had a rough night trying to get to sleep and Nikki not only was on my mind all day yesterday, she's even moreso in my thoughts today.

But no more pain and suffering for our sister. She's doing her painting and writing her poetry in heaven now.

It's funny, but just as I wrote this line, the cloud cover that has cast an appropriately gloomy start to the day here suddenly parted to allow some rays of sunshine to beam through my window. It was predicted to be sunny and 83 today, so maybe it'll help lighten the sense of loss I and everybody who knew and loved Nikki feels.

What will really help me is for LMPD to find, arrest, convict and permanently send to Eddyville the wastes of DNA who committed the crime.

Nikki, say hello to Tyra, Channelle, Gabrielle, Kellie, Ukea, Stephanie, Saneshia, Ebony and all our other fallen sisters for us.

We'll see you again soon.

6 comments:

Lisa Harney said...

Oh no. :(

Hugs and sympathies.

Mireille said...

I am so sorry. I... I really don't know what to say because... it's wrong for so many reasons. Please, i wish you my condolences for a women of color who was killed for... jeez, is there ever a right reason? It's just so wrong... so wrong.

belledame222 said...

Sympathies, outrage.

PinayTG said...

I'm so so sorry for your loss Monica. :( Here's sending you vibes of strength across the oceans. *HUGS* Much love!

Monica Roberts said...

Thanks, everyone.

I was telling one of Niki's family members at the funeral that when you're transgender, your family expands, not contracts.

We in the Louisville transgender community need to focus on getting better organized and working together to improve lives for all of us. That can be the best way to honor her memory.

Xavier said...

It hit me like a ton of bricks to find out about Nikki. She became a friend of mine a few years through a mutual friend. I'll keep you and her family in my prayers.