Diamond Stylz- Her Comments About Chimamanda Adichie

It's been a while since I've posted one of Diamond's videos, and this one definitely deserves to be signal boosted.

I've said what I've had to say about Chimamanda Adichie, and now Diamond Stylz weighs in on Adichie's problematic comments about trans women

'This Is Everything: Gigi Gorgeous' Movie Trailer

One of the things we are going to need now more than ever during this Trump regime is trans people telling their stories in the media.

Gigi Gorgeous and I crossed paths when I was in San Francisco to accept the award I received at the GLAAD Gala last September.  While she was slaying the red carpet, I was quietly observing everything that was going on with a wine glass in my hand and Angelica Ross at my side for that moment knowing that my moment to shine was coming later.

Our opportunity to meet each other didn't happen because after my GLAAD Gala speech, it was my turn to have folks surrounding me to chat, congratulate me for the award and getting my thoughts about the looming election. so unfortunately an opportunity for me to meet, talk and get to know her was lost.

If it's meant to happen, we will cross paths again.

Frankly I didn't know much about the 24 year old Canadian YouTube star and model until that evening.  Once I returned home to Texas I hit Google and started doing the research about her and her transfeminine journey.   It was fascinating watching some of her videos and learning that she had a following of over 1 million subscribers on YouTube since she started her channel in 2008.

 

Now YouTube Red is about to release a documentary on her entitled This Is Everything: Gigi Gorgeous that tells the story of Giselle Lazzarato's trans journey, and here's the extended trailer for it.



In the movie she talks about how YouTube became her therapist and journal where she posted her thoughts, and also discussed her thoughts about being denied entry into Dubai last summer because of her trans status.

The documentary debuts in select theaters on February 3 and on YouTube Red February 8

Kyle Dixon of 'Below Deck' Comes Out As Trans Attracted

“Most men who are attracted to and date transgender women are probably stigmatized more than trans women are,  I think a man who is dating trans women, who is a celebrity, or famous or is an athlete or something, needs to come forward –- or a musician –- and needs to say, ‘I love transgender women and [they] deserve to be loved and I’m going to declare that publicly.’ I think those men need some sort of inspiration and hope, so they can live more authentically.”-Laverne Cox 

Trans folks are just like everyone else in this planet in that we are looking for someone who not only loves us, but will do so until death do us part.    One thing that I admire and envy about our transmasculine population is that they far more often are in relationships that can and do lead to marriage with cisgender people  

It does happen for girls like us.  I know trans women who have been in relationships, married to or have been married to cis men in some cases for decades.   But in my two decades of personal observations of our community, I've seen far more transmasculine folks in coupled relationships with cis people than I have trans feminine people coupes with cis people and know from personal experience how hard it is for a trans feminine person to date. .

I have met and count among my friends some amazing cis men who have dated,are currently dating or are happily married to trans women

When I have those conversations with those cis men about why they love girls like us, the reasons go across the spectrum, but the major takeaways are that they date us because they prefer and see trans women as viable dating and life partners.

What Laverne was talking about in that June 2015 SiriusXM Progress interview with Michelangelo Signorile may have just come to pass in terms of a celebrity coming out and stating that he dates trans women and why y'all tripping about it?

Kyle Dixon from the Bravo reality series Below Deck has not only come out to the crew on the show as bisexual, he also revealed that he was currently dating a trans woman

It's not a professional athlete or a major film or TV star (yet)  but it's a start that hopefully will lead to others following suit.  Breaking down the stigma and toxic masculinity surrounding dating trans women is a vital component to eventually stemming the unacceptably bloody tide of trans women of color being murdered by people who they were in dating relationships with or hooked up with sexually

If this leads to a broader conversation about trans attracted men and and the role they need to play in squashing transmisogyny, bring that conversation on.

India's Now Reporting The News In The UK

Some interesting news (pun intended) coming from across The Pond about a British TV news reporter for ITV who has transitioned at age 51 and by doing so, has according to a report in The Mirror become the first out trans television reporter in the UK.

India Willoughby was a longtime reporter familiar to millions of viewers on the ITV Borders regional news program.

But as many trans people are all too familiar with, she was unhappy not living as her true self, and in 2010 started taking the evolutionary steps in becoming the person she is now.

She changed her name and quit her dream high profile television presenter job at ITV to transition. She spent the next five years working in Newcastle for a public relations firm.  After her GRS last year, she decided she wanted to get back into television news, and was hired by ITV Tyne Tees.

She has no plans to go back on air, but she's happy with the person she sees in the mirror now and wouldn't be opposed to one day be reading the news on air again as India.

And hope that happens for you sooner rather than later.
 

Black Transwomen, Inc AYOMBI Online Trans Feminine Support Group MeetingTonight

One of the things that was discussed during the recently concluded BTAC 2016 conference was ramped up programming for the Black Transmen, Inc (BTMI) sister organization Black Transwomen, Inc (BTWI).

We had a Grand AYOMBI during the conference moderated by Dee Dee Watters, and tonight, BTWI will begin holding on the second Thursday of every month online AYOMBI Sister Circle meetings.

They start at 7 PM CDT and if you wish to participate in AYOMBI, you need to register at this link to receive your invitation.

The May AYOMBI meeting will be facilitated by Jade Lenore, and the topic is "Self Love..What Do I Feel I Deserve In Love And Life?'   The meeting will open at 6:45 PM with the meeting beginning at 7 PM for all guests who have registered to attend.

So what's AYOMBI?  It's a BTWI sponsored monthly gathering of  sisters withing a safe, respectful and confidential environment opened to all trans women at all stages of their transitions.  BTWI understands that at times, there's a need to ask questions, express feelings, and express transitioning concerns.

In this AYOMBI space the goal is to on a monthly basis explore relevant topics of the transition journey.  

AYOMBI is a free service that is offered and presented by the women of Black Transwomen, Inc.  If you require further information or have questions about it, you can call BTWI at 1-855-255-8636

Historic Day For Trans WOC At The White House

I've been coming to Washington DC since 1998 to lobby for trans human rights issues, policy meetings, board meetings, retreats, and panel discussions.  I've even been to the White House four times.

But this fifth trip to the White House was special and historic, because for the first time trans women of color, fittingly on the Transgender Day of Visibility, were gathering from around the country for the inaugural White House Trans Women Of Color Women's History Month Briefing.

It was organized by the National LGBTQ Task Force's Kylar Broadus and kicked off at 9:00 AM in the Eisenhower Executive Office Building's South Auditorium with opening remarks from Aditi Hardikar from the White House Office of Public Engagement.

She was quickly followed by Tina Tchen from the White House Council For Women and Girls and Stacey Long Simmons from the Task Force before we dove into the policy remarks part of the program.

Cecilia Chung started the policy portion of it with some framing remarks before yielding the platform to my fellow TPOCC board member Mattee Jim and LaLa Zannell from the National Anti Violence Project.

Mattee's commentary focused on the issues that Native American and rural trans women face, while LaLa focused on discussing how many of the women we have lost to anti-trans violence were actually intimate partner violence (IPV) cases.

Zannell also pointed out that trans women are less likely to be protected from IPV and some recommendations to change that negative paradigm.

When those ladies were done with their presentations, Ruby Corado of Casa Ruby and Bamby Salcedo of the Trans Latina Coalition were up next.

Corado's presentation concentrated on HIV status, how it affects trans women and the issues that revolve around that but reminded us that 'action solves problems.' 

Salcedo talked about our trans Latina sisters an the issues they face in ICE detention including sexual assault and HIV infection and pointed out "It's important for us to understand how structural violence plays into us getting killed.".

Tracee McDaniel from the Juxtaposed Center for Transformation, Inc in Atlanta and Kylar Broadus from the National LGBTQ Task Force talked about the employment discrimination that trans women of color face on the micro and macro levels..

The final two person info panelists were Dr. Ayana Elliott, FNP and Raffi Friedman-Gurspan from the National Center for Transgender Equality.  Dr Elliott got our attention by stating 'Transgender women are an endangered species," then broke down the statistics across various health categories to back that sobering statement up.   

Raffi's presentation also contained some suggested policy recommendations for the assembled White House staffers and trans women of color from across the country nodding their heads in agreement.

When their panel was finished, Roy Austin, the Deputy Assistant to the President for the Office of Urban Affairs  Justice and Opportunity, took a few moments in his remarks to update us on where things stood on trans issues inside the Obama Administration.

In addition to informing us that Title VII the Civil Rights Act of 1964 covers  transpeople, Austin also discussed a Task Force on 21st Century Policing report that urged in its recommendations that police departments and law enforcement personnel across the US improve their relations with their local trans communities (which probably explains the invite I got from Harris County DA Devon Anderson last week to talk about issues of importance to the Houston trans community).

He opened it up for questions, and I asked about the possibility of getting mandated national standards for ID.  I pointed out that much of the discrimination we face is triggered by mismatched identification that in many cases the states throw up multiple barriers for us to correct.

After taking a few questions, Mr Austin departed, and a super info panel was convened in which audience members received a few moments of the remaining time left in the event to ask the info panelists questions.

After remarks from Aditi, Kylar and Stacey and a poem from Cherno Biko, the briefing ended at 12 noon EDT.

We then headed to the National LGBTQ Task Force headquarters on Massachusetts Ave for lunch and remarks from Stacey Long Simmons, outgoing deputy director Darlene Nipper, and incoming deputy director Russell Roybal.. 

It was my first visit to Task Force headquarters since the 2000 National Transgender Policy Meeting they facilitated at their old NE Washington DC digs.  It was fun reconnecting with all my friends in the Task Force from the Creating Change team (and yes H-town, I let them know we want to host it again), and was happy to see Kathleen Campisano and Sarah Reece from my days of causing angelic trouble in Louisville with both of them.

We also were in the building on Nipper's last official day as deputy director, and we gave her a standing ovation when she was finished.

Major thanks to Kylar and Stacey for the invitation to be there for this historic briefing, lunch, and to super intern Dominique Chamely who did a wonderful job on the logistical end getting me and my trans sisters to DC from our various spots around the country.

And thanks to all my transsisters who made this historic day at the White House and this 6th annual Trans Day of Visibility a memorable one for me.

I Don't Mind Being A Mentor...But

One of the things that I have made a priority ever since I started my own transition 20 years ago was to one day be that mentor to the next generation of trans women I wish I'd had at the start of my journey.

I'm still evolving into the person I wish to be, and along the way I have accumulated a lot of knowledge and history I want and need to pass down to the next generation of trans women.   

But there are some ground rules.

Rule number one is when you get to be my age, you pass down the knowledge I'm telling you as my mentee to a trans person younger than you someday. 

One of the things that royally pissed me off with my predecessors is that elements of them hoarded the knowledge about transition like it was the secret recipe to KFC.  Thanks to the Internet, that type of gatekeeping is impossible now, but it was a handicap during my trans formative years in the 70's and 80's when I was seeking knowledge on a wide variety of fronts, including about our trans history. 

Rule number two is listen.   The object of me mentoring you is to pass down knowledge that you respectfully listen to, then do what you will with it to confidently blaze your own trail.   If you're not willing to listen to what I have to say, then it's a waste of my valuable time.  That's also valuable time I can spend with someone else who is more respectful of my time and my status as a elder stateswoman who paid her movement dues. 

Rule number three is critically think. I am human.  I don't walk on water.  While I will do my best to make sure any information I pass down to my mentees is accurate, it doesn't hurt for you to cross check it and make sure it is.   It won't hurt my feelings if you let me know if I'm incorrect about something I told you so I can adjust it.

Rule number four, don't betray my mentor's trust in you.    I and my fellow trans elders are willing to share our experiences, wisdom and stories because we see something in you as future leaders.  We're hoping that you will use the info we give you to make yourselves better leaders, pass it down to future generations and uplift our entire community as a result. 

But don't stab us and the community in the back

Rule number five, this mentorship is a two way street.   There is not only information and history I get to pass down to you, but at the same time your input is valuable to me.   It not only keeps me up to date on how things have evolved, it gives me an idea of what the trans landscape was like when you began to transition so I have a baseline frame of reference as to the forces that shaped your thinking.  It also helps me properly target my advice for maximum positive effect.  

I don't mind being a mentor.  I enjoy it and see it as part of my activist job description.  I had the same kind of help from veteran activists when I was a novice, still get it and eagerly seek it out.  It's time for me to pay it forward. 

It also keeps my thinking on these issues from becoming stagnant and rigid.  

And hopefully me and my trans elders mentoring puts you on the road to becoming the best activist for our people you can be, and makes us better ones. 

We're Still Watching You, Smith College

Smith's dean of admissions, Debra Shaver, announced a committee would form to address the needs of prospective trans students at Smith. The committee will begin meeting in September, and in the interim, Smith will stop denying admissions to trans girls and women listed as male on their Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA) forms, which is what happened to Wong.

TransGriot  September 1, 'Smith College, Don't Assume The Trans Community Forgot About What Happened To Calliope "


The Fall 2013 semester is rapidly drawing to a close on the Smith College campus and this article that popped up in the University of Connecticut student newspaper concerning Calliope Wong reminded me about the controversy that erupted last May when her application for admission was denied twice.

That firestorm led to the announcement at the time by Smith Dean of Admissions Debra Shaver that a committee would be formed that would start work in the fall to address the needs of prospective trans students at Smith.

Calliope is now a freshman English major at UConn and was named to the OUT100 List as a trans teen advocate along with Jazz and Zachary Kerr.  

And Smith could have been reaping the benefits of Calliope's presence on their campus.

But this is the question we all want to know the answer to Trans World because there has been cricket chirping silence coming out of Northampton since the semester started.

What's going on with the committee that was supposed to start work on this trans admission issue?

I asked that question on my Facebook page, and JoJo Thomas, a Smith alum who is one of my longtime TransGriot readers was kind enough to send an e-mail asking that same question on the alumni listserv. 

JoJo did get a quick response to her query.  According to her, a fellow alum advised her that according to the student group working on this issue Audrey Smith (the VP of Enrollment--head of Office of Admissions and Student Financial Services) would be making announcements "soon" about changes in the policies.

How soon is "soon" in terms of a definitive date that a policy change announcement will happen, we don't know yet.  But if there more feet dragging until the end of the 2014 spring semester, Mama Moni ain't gonna be happy and the volume is going to be cranked up on this issue by moi.

Meet Girl LIke Us Model Ines Rau!

Trans feminine models have been strutting catwalks, rocking magazine covers and gracing print ads since Great Britain's April Ashley did so in the early 1960s. 

Now thanks to a steamy NSFW photo shoot with Tyson Beckford another name has been added to that distinguished list of trans models in 24 year old Paris born and New York based model Ines-Loan  Rau. 

The 5' 10 beauty is of North African-Latin descent, transitioned at age 16 and was discovered by French modeling scouts.  

According to a Models.com interview, she was inspired to come out as trans after reading Caroline Tula' Cossey's book I Am Woman twice.

After reading her book [I Am Woman] at least two times I realized how important it is to assume who you are with no fears. I am twenty-four years old and have done the change very young, at 16. Until now I wasn’t really out about it. I just woke up one day realizing that it’s enough, I need to embrace who I am and be loved for what I am and what I have been through- without the fear of being rejected.

And we're glad you did, Ines.  Looking forward to meeting you someday.