Love Your Black Trans KIds

One of the things that I have been angry about in my Black community is the disturbing pattern of a cadre of Black parents when their child reveals to them they are trans, negatively react by throwing them out of their homes.

It is a problem so pervasive that 13% of homeless transgender kids in the US are African-American, and that needs to stop.  I was cognizant of in it the late 70's when I was a teen debating whether to tell my own parents about my desire to transition.

It's a pattern I prayerfully hope is finally changing thanks to Black parents of trans kids who believe the best way to deal with a transgender child is envelop them in love and raise them, not kick them out on the street.

Research shows that trans kids having supportive parents can have a profound positive effect on trans kids,and it stands to reason that if they are happier in childhood, they will grow up to become happier well adjusted adults.  

I have been pleased to see in the last few years more Black trans parents at events and conventions in which parents of trans kids gather.

I have much love and respect for DeShanna Neal, who is raising an amazing trans feminine teen daughter in Trinity, who is telling her story in this ESSENCE article.   I was also pleased to see J.R. Ford, one of the trans dads who is speaking out about raising a trans child in this video.

I was thrilled to discover during the recent Gender Infinity Conference I attended that more Black parents are supporting their trans kids and not throwing them on the streets and starting to step up to leadership roles.

I was introduced during Gender Infinity to Gail Levein Barnett, who sits on the Houston PFLAG board and has a trans daughter.

I also met during the conference Jodie Patterson, who is raising her trans son Penel and talked about it during her keynote speech.

I also met other Black parents of trans kids at Gender Infinity and others during this year who have told me they not only love and support them, it's past time for the transphobic ignorance aimed at them and trans people of all ages in our Black community to immediately end.

I agree with them on that point.  Black America, it's past time for you to stop listening to anti-trans talking points that came from white fundamentalists, being regurgitated by your ministers cooning it up for conservacash and conservative media attention and other ignorant know-nothings.

And yes, in a world in which right wing politicians are ramping up anti-trans hatred for their own political gain, it's even more imperative that we see more Black parents of trans kids and their allies on the front lines defending our trans youth from legislative and rhetorical attack.

It is past time for Black America to unconditionally love their trans children, not revile them.  It's also imperative that we Black trans adults shower our trans kids with love and support our Mama and Papa Bears raising those kids.   As the possibility models for those trans kids, if we don't love and support our trans kids or the parents raising those trans children, who will? 

I am willing to help my people accomplish that mission by working with the parents of trans kids to point out they exist, do what I can to support them, and relentlessly point out the humanity of our trans children is not up for debate or discussion.

If you believe that the children are our future, as the classic lyrics of the song 'The Greatest Love Of All' states, and claim you love our children, then by extension, Black trans kids are included.

Facing Homelessness

Homelessness is  a critical issue for trans people, with one in five having experienced homelessness at some time in their lives because of discrimination and family rejection. As a result, an estimated 20-40% of the more than 1.6 million homeless youth in the United States are LGBT

Unfortunately, transgender people facing homelessness also face discrimination from agencies that should be helping them, with nearly one in three (29%) reporting being turned away from a shelter due to their transgender status. While leading experts on homelessness recommend providing emergency housing consistent with a person’s gender identity, 42% of trans people facing homelessness have been forced to stay in a shelter living as the wrong gender.

In the 20 years I've been transtioned, while I've dealt with unemployment, I've always managed on one level or another to keep a roof over my head and avoid being part of that trans homeless narrative.

Until now. 

Due to a confluence of events, I'm about to get bounced from the place I've called home for the last four years, and one of the relocation options I was counting on fell through.  

So I'm staring at the prospect of being part of the transgender homeless stats after having a triumphant moment last week in H-town of being honored with three local Readers Choice awards. 

One of the most basic parts of life is to have a roof over your head that is yours.  I've been the person that has been when I had my own apartment in the 90's offered my couch for someone in the community to stay on and get back on their feet.    

>Now I'm the one in that position, and it's a depressing circumstance to be in, especially when you're aware that many of the shelters here are transphobic and not an option, and because I was a caretaker for my  grandmother and the housing was part of the deal, I'm not rolling in cash to put a deposit down on an apartment .


And I can only imagine what it's like for a transgender kid who suddenly gets thrown out of their home because of family disapproval.

Yeah, it sucks to be in this situation.   And what hurts is I've always been the type of person that wants to  solve my problems on my own before calling for help.   It has to be something major for me to do that. 

Well, I'd say facing being out on the street qualifies as a major problem..

All I'm really looking for is a place for about four to six weeks until I can get a more permanent solution to my personal housing bubble. 

And I'm running out of time to find it