Dear Transphobic People

It's past time to call these fools and trans haters out on a regular basis,  and there are enough of them out there for me to skewer on a regular basis.  

So let's get this party started.

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Dear Transphobic People,

One of the things I've been quite pissed off about is you peeps who call yourselves Republicans or conservatives, mad because you lost the Obergefell SCOTUS case, retooling and turning your anti-gay industry and Right Wing Noise Machine loose on the trans community.

You ran your standard disinformation and demonization playbook.  You've retooled the predator myth you used on the gay community to attack trans women, and attacked our trans kids and their parents.

You started World War T expecting an easy political Culture War win you could ride to 2018 GOP primary midterm success, and have been shocked to find out that we had more allies than you thought.   We're also fighting your right wing behinds tooth and nail because frankly, you messed with us and our kids, and we have no choice but to fight you back and win.

And what made you peeps think that trans folks, who have fought tooth and nail and gone through hell to become their true selves, were going to just roll over for you?  

Hell naw, we weren't.  We're going to fight your GOP behinds tooth and nail until you leave us alone and stop attacking our humanity and human rights. .

And yeah, the slimiest people are the so called pastors pimping anti-trans hate from their pulpits and politicians like former NC governor Pat McCrory (R) and current (for now) Texas Lt/ Governor Dan  'Potty Panic' Patrick (R)  who are pushing anti-trans hate for his political benefit next year.

But Pat McCrory found out that hatin' on trans people isn't the ticket to electoral success.  So did former Texas House state reps Debbie Riddle (R-Tomball) and Gilbert Pena (R-Pasadena) who pushed four anti-trans bills that were defeated in the 2015 Texas Lege session and found themselves flushed by the voters outside of the Pink Dome when the 2017 session started.  

We can only hope that Dan Patrick. Sen Lois Kolkhorst  (R-Brenham) and Sen. Eddie Lucio, Jr's (DINO-Brownsville)  the only Democrat to vote for SB 6) political careers will suffer the same fate as SB 6 for messing with Texas trans kids and Texas trans women.

TransGriot Ten Questions Interview- Rev Joshua Holiday

TransGriot Note: Ten Questions is a segment in which I talk to people inside our community, the up and coming leaders, opinion shapers, artists, thinkers, icons and interesting personalities who are molding and shaping our chocolate trans world.  

Rev. Joshua Holiday is a native New Yorker who I had the enjoyable pleasure of meeting at the 2005 Transsistahs-Transbrothas Conference in Louisville.  Joshua is a minister, passionate advocate and activist in the Atlanta area.  You can find him at The Fellowship-The Shepherd's Table Covenant Church Hillside Chapel and Truth Center when he's not spending his time diligently working for the uplifting of our community.

His posts on faith issues pop up from time to time on my blog and he's an avid Yankees fan, but I still love him anyway.  


Time for Rev Joshua Holiday to answer the TransGriot's Ten Questions.
 
1. If our African descended trans elders could come back, observe and critique us, would you think they'd be proud of us, be neutral about us, or putting their collective foot up our behinds?

JH- I think it would be neutral.  I say that because as African Americans, PERIOD, I feel we have lost any connection with our African and Caribbean ancestors.  I see so many African Americans look down on Africans and vice versa.  The powers that be have been successful at creating a definite rift between us.  I also think they would be proud because we have come a long way, at least here in America and we are standing up better then ever before.

2. Who are some of your trans leadership role models?

JH-As a New Yorker, I have to give props to Sylvia Rivera.  She did so much and gave up so much as well.  As you know, her and Miss Major, were two of the unacknowledged transpersons present at Stonewall.  

3. What is the one thing you'd like to tell the peeps who oppose us who think that it is impossible to be trans and Christian?  

JH-Get over it.  God created me to be exactly who I am, to do all the things in life I have and will accomplish.

4. Who are some of the up and coming young African American transmen leaders you think will have a major impact on our community?

JH-Most are ones people don't even know yet.  And even though some are stealth.  In my counseling some of these young guys, I see a generation of transmen who are not going to except other people's limits and I am excited.


5.  Are there perceptible difference in your mind between the activist community in New York and the other areas in which you have lived?  

JH-Of course there are differences.  New Yorkers are more open minded and Liberal minded.  We accept that and understand people because there are so many different ethnic groups in  the North.  We are literally raised to be activist.  To support people and who they are.    

 

Being in what we call the Bible Belt, Southerners have this ridiculous view of what they believe God says in the Bible, which by the way, has been mostly mistranslated.  Activism and living outside the box is not common place in the these areas.  I do see change happening and happy about the whole thing...LOL

6.  Do you believe we need more FUBU style projects such as the Transsistahs-Transbrothas conference, the Trans Health Conference event in Philadelphia or doing more to increase our presence in the overall trans community?

JH-Honestly, one side of me says there are enough conferences.  The other side says those conferences don't respect Transgender people of color  So, I guess we still need to make ourselves heard and respected.  In the meantime, we need to MAKE these same people respect us for who we are and the work we do.


7.  What's the one thing about Joshua nobody knows that you feel free to share with my readers?

JH-Many people think I'm a smartass.  Ok well, I am. I don't think a lot of people know that I am disabled because I don't talk a lot about it and because it's not visible.

8.  What projects are you working on that you'd like to talk about?

JH-I'm preparing to go back to school in the fall.  I'm hopefully helping to get Atlanta on the overall Transgender map, so we aren't known for just one event.  Breaking stereotypes and expectations.


9.  What do you think the Yankees chances are in the upcoming 2011 baseball season? 

JH-That is still up in the air, though Baseball Tonight on ESPN, has them as the #2 team.
10.  Where do you see the African-American trans community ten years from now?

JH-I see us in a very good place and once again, I'm excited about the whole thing.

A Transsistah's Secret -Pantyhose

Whatever side you come down on in the Great Pantyhose Debate,  (or tights as they call them in the UK) for trans fashionistas they are a necessary evil. 

Personally I like them, I'm comfortable and and down with wearing them and I'm in the old school camp of an outfit isn't complete without them.    They not only improve the look of your legs and make the men all pause if you have the legs for it, but can be a major ally in terms of pre-op/non-op passability by keeping your neoclit from popping out at a very inopportune time. 
 
But for those of you just beginning your transition journey into femininity and the wonderful world of hosiery, your biggest questions are what's the difference between control top, sheer to waist, opaque, sheer toe or reinforced toe pantyhose and what size do I get.?  

Well, I can definitely help you there.   I worked at a Macy's in Da Ville for five years in the jewelry and watch section.   It had a hosiery section attached to it at the time in which I worked with a wonderful lady named Dorothy Fow until the department was downsized three years into my time there and moved to the lingerie area on the second floor.  

She taught me a lot about what I know,  in addition to me putting my lips in neutral long enough to listen to her talk to other customers and help them select the perfect pair for that fashion forward event or Derby party..
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So you might say I know a little something something about hosiery.

Anyway, let's begin Pantyhose 101 shall we?

The first order of business it take a look at the back of the package and check out the sizing chart.  Every brand, including the store brands you'll pick up at your local CVS or Walgreen's has them and they are unique to each brand or style of hose, even within the same hosiery manufacturing family. 

Some brands will also print height and weight ranges to help guide you in the selection process as well
Hanes is the largest manufacturer of pantyhose followed by Berkshire, so I'll borrow the Hanes sizing chart to give you an example.
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One column of the chart will have your height, the other side your weight.    Be honest about your weight when you are at this stage because if they are too tight, you'll know it because you'll increase the likelihood they'll run when you put them on.    

If you're one of those petite size girls  in a certain weight range they tend to be in the AB size ranges on most charts.  Taller girls up to six feet tend to be in the CD ranges, and the petite to average height girls who are heavier the EF range.

I could get away with wearing Hanes CD's in some styles, but in order to reduce my chances.of runs, I learned very quickly that for us supersized and supermodel sized girls, the queen sized hose are our friends.

Then there's the difference between control top, sheer to waist,  sheer toe, reinforced toe, ultra sheer, opaque, French cut panty or increasingly,  footless ones.   They leave your toes open when you wear open toed sandals but cover your foot and leg.

Control top is just what it says, it's nylon reinforced down to your thighs to help mold and shape you in a bit.    If you tend to wear shorter dresses and skirts, you wan to opt for the sheer to waist styles in order to avoid that reinforced panty zone line from showing if your skirt rides up.   It also tends to have a shimmer to it as well and they come in reinforced toe or sheer toe styles.    

Sheer to waist is exactly what it means, sheer from your toe all the way up to the waist.

French cut panty are the blend of a sheer to waist or reinforced to pantyhose, but the panty area has a bikini style panty in the crotch area so you can wear them with shorter dresses and skirts.


Ultra sheers are barely there nude range color or black hose you get when you want to show off legs but just have a hint of a hose.   Opaque hose do the opposite.  

For you Brits, if you ask for tights here, this is the image that pops into your American cousins minds.   They refer to opaque style hose we wear in the fall and winter that help keep legs warm and look good doing so.    They come in a wide array of  colors and patterns   They can also be whimsical in nature like a younger woman I spotted one day while out and about wearing some with smiley faces on them.   

While I like the HUE tights because they have them for us supermodel sized girls, they are $8.50 to $12.00 a pair.  But you know the frugal Taurean in me found a brand that works just as well for gar less cash out of my pocket     I get my HUE's on sale and for everyday wear grab my drugstore brand..

Tights are a fall-winter fashion thing for when you have those occasions where a pantsuit won't do, you have to wear a skirted dress suit, you want to wear a leather skirt or sweater outfit or put some pop into your presentation by adding a dash of color.

As for avoiding the dreaded runs and getting more mileage and wear out of your hosiery, wash them on a regular basis in the sink with a hosiery wash.  Sometimes I'll do a dishwashing liquid, and let them air dry in the bathroom.   I also wait until the last moment possible to put them on before I put on the rest of my clothes and head out the door to minimize any snags, 

And do those pedicures on a regular basis.   They not only reduce stress, help with your femme presentation and give you a confidence boost, they help you prvent pantyhose runs as well

The pedicure eliminates those jagged toenails or cracked heels that can cause friction or microscopic tears that will become runs later. .


If you have a reinforced toe, it helps.  But in a sheer toe or ultra sheer style hose a microscopic tear that a jagged toenail or rough heels cause as you slide them on can develop into a run later. .

As for colors, it depends on your skin tone and what looks best with ir and that's a trial and error thing.    For my chocolate trans sisters, can't go wrong with black hose on our legs.    Browns or nudes are a little more problematic in that you have to have the right style of brown for your skin tone. to get that nude look.    .

It's also not necessary to get the high end hose all the time.   The drugstore brand are made by the major manufacturers quiet as it's kept     

But I do like how Hanes and Berkshires look on my legs and the feel of them, so I just either buy them in bulk or catch them on sale and keep a nice stockpile of them. 


So there you are peeps.  Everythang you needed to know about hosiery that I can tell you. 

Happy hosiery shopping, people..    

A Transsistah's Secret Posts

The Transsistah's Secret posts are an ongoing series I started doing to pass on some of the stuff about transition it took me years to learn.    Now I'm putting it in one handy post so you TransGriot readers don't have to hunt through 3000 plus posts for them and help me figure out what subjects I need to tackle next.  

But if you do have time to surf the blog and dig into the archives, don't let me dissuade you from doing so.

A Transsistah's Secret Posts


The Boobies

Legs

Tucking

Hair

Makeup

Facial Hair Removal

Bras

Walking In Pumps

SBH Magazine

Observation And Practice

Being Comfortable In Your Own Skin

TransGriot Ten Questions Interview-Tona Brown

TransGriot Note:  What I envision for this TransGriot Ten Questions interview segment is to on a regular basis talk to people inside our community, the up and coming leaders, opinion shapers, artists, thinkers, icons and interesting personalities who are molding and shaping our chocolate trans world.  


This interview is with Tona Brown, who not only has mad classical music skills, she has begun stepping out as a leader and role model to the transwomen of her generation.   She's also performing in a upcoming concert with trans musician Desiree Hines as part of the TDOR events in Baltimore, MD.  


Time for Tona to answer the TransGriot's Ten Questions:


1-You've had a few interesting changes in your life over the last few years. How have they impacted you?

TB-Like anyone else I have had to deal with the effects of a rough economy and the struggles of being a classical artist in America. But I really can't complain too much. The Lord does provide when I least expect it. But moving to Baltimore has had its challenges but overall its been a good experience. I find that the GLBT organizations here are really trying to make a difference and many of them are trans inclusive which is nice.

2-How have you incorporated your world class musical talents into your activism?

TB- I have decided to use performance opportunities as ways to advocate for my community. Often times people do not expect musicians to have an opinion about much of anything unless you are a celebrity. I was really honored to be asked to sing the National Anthem at the Department of Veterans Affairs this year. It was really great and I got the opportunity to share my story with all the veterans. I applaud them for all they do for this country and would do it again if asked to do so.. Maybe not at 8 am! LOL.  The recordings are on YouTube.

3-What are your thoughts about the upcoming TDOR and what does that day mean to you?

TB- The Transgendered Day of Remembrance is very important to me and I usually perform every year for a vigil somewhere on the east coast. I think its imperative that trans people let the world know about the horrendous hate crimes against our community. Its great that we have this day to commemorate those that have been slain just for being who they are.

This upcoming TDOR is very special to me because I am currently residing in Baltimore, MD and Mayor Stephanie Rawlings Blake will be holding a press conference to let the city know about the events around the city dedicated to TDOR. It's really great to see a local government take part in this day as well. It shows that the city does care about its citizens black, white, gay or transgender.

4-How excited are you to be performing with another musically gifted transperson in Desiree Hines? 

TB- I am very excited to share the stage with Desiree Hines. Its such a pleasure to be able to perform with another sister of color and to really show the world what we can do. There are so many negative stereotypes about transwomen. I have often felt alone as a trans artist of color in classical music. Meeting and speaking with Desiree Hines has been a rewarding and gratifying experience and I wanted to include her on this project. She of course was excited and thought the concert was an excellent idea! I mean how lucky are we to be able to perform together as two beautiful and talented sisters of color performing the music we love so much in a beautiful church amongst our community.

I will be performing with Ms. Hines again a few weeks later on December 1st for the Out Music Awards in NYC. We are very excited to be one of the opening acts for what is being called the "Gay Emmys" being broadcast on LOGO-TV for 40 million viewers! Here again we will dispel negative stigma and stereotypes and let the WORLD see how dynamic we are. I hope to see more sisters like us grace the stages and demand attention in the future on platforms like these.

5-How important is it to have African-American trans role models, and do you feel we have enough or of them or not enough of them?

TB- I feel that it is imperative for young African American Transexuals to have role models that look just like them! I know growing up in Norfolk, VA I never saw anyone that looked liked me and that made it harder for me to transition. Our community does have a number of role models and many more that live in "stealth" the problem is that these men and women are not speaking out and showing everyone who they are and what abilities they have. This makes advocating for our community very hard because we don't have more examples or statistics to show what our community does and what it needs.

How are we to expect trans women to know what it means to be ladies or guys to be gentlemen if there are no role models out there for them to learn from? If we are not speaking out and fighting then I fear the worst for our young transmen and women who will be here years after we all pass away. I want it to be easier for them to follow their dreams and achieve their goals.


6-As you observe our African-descended trans community, what are the things we are doing right and what do you think we need to improve on?

TB- The AA trans community is definitely doing some things very well for instance we are starting to speak out against injustice, sensationalism in the media, and start our own organizations that will be able to express our unique needs to the government. But the numbers of those participating are still low. That needs to change dramatically.

On a positive note..We look good! I must say that my brothers and sisters are some of the most beautiful people in the world and that makes me very proud. However, what are our young people using these good looks for and to do? The skies are truly the limits and no longer can a transexual use being a transexual as an excuse not to work and be a productive member of society. Will the road be hard. Of course it is! But its not impossible! We see it everyday!

My biggest complaint is our lack of unity. So many of us tend to bring a street mentality to life, relationships and even advocacy. Its all about the competition of who looks the best and who has the best looking mate or the nicest car or even who has the most work done.. Instead of any continuity or congruency amongst our people.

That must change. We are too preoccupied with all things that are materialistic. We want everything to quick and we are not willing to put in the hard work or willing to be vulnerable enough to grow. But this is not just an issue for trans people of color this is an issue for all people of color.


7-Do you believe your trans elders are doing enough to pass down our history to your generation of trans people?

TB- I do not feel that my trans elders are doing enough to share the stories of those before them or even about themselves. As a young woman I want to know that I am not alone and I want to be able to open a book and see women LIKE ME! I feel that is changing slowly but surely. But there is not enough literature out there. I also feel that we don't acknowledge our trans elders at all.. I was so pleased to see it done for the first time here in Baltimore at Baltimore Black Pride a few years ago and IN Philly there was a pioneer workshop. But we need more of it. The baby boomers are seasoned and mature and there are a lot of stories that are lost in the mix! Those stories are our stories and include the history of transgendered people in America!

8-How important is it to form friendships and working relationships with other African descended trans and cis women?

TB- I think that positive interpersonal relationships are very important among women both trans and cis gendered. No one is saying that every female you meet is going to understand you or be your best friend. But we can all learn from each other. Also my trans sisters must understand that we are essentially all we have. EACH OTHER.. The more you alienate yourself from other transwomen the worst off you become. Can you trust every lady because she is also trans OF COURSE NOT! But those that you can trust and that you can at least learn something from then open your mind and heart to doing so. We all have our own unique history and validity in this community.
9-If you could perform with any artist at any venue in the world, who would that artist be and where would you perform?

TB- If I could perform with any artist in any venue in the world it would have to be La Scala Opera House in Milan, Italy with Anne Sophie Mutter, Jessye Norman, Grace Bumbry, Leontyne Price or Shirley Verret! . 


10-And what do you see for yourself and the transcommunity of color ten years down the road? 

TB- My hopes for the transcommunity ten years down the road are to see more trans people breaking stereotypes and being leaders. I would like to see more artists as well of all genres performing main stream and getting acceptance from the masses. People are getting more comfortable with the gay issues but are not really relating to individuals that are transgendered.. Right now we are still so taboo and strange. That won't change until we are more public about our lives..

I would also like to see more transpeople married and in long term relationships. I would love to attend the weddings of many of my sisters and to be married myself one day. I would also like to see the men and women that love us stand up and speak up for us as well.. We have too many "silent" partners- I call them. That will not change until we hold them accountable. They love you but don't want the world to know or wish to remain anonymous in order to deflect the despairing views of their family, friends, coworkers etc. But until this thought pattern changes it will be hard for us to be seen as "normal"

Until you can show an entire TV show of trans people married and happy in long term relationships and their partners speaking up and saying "I love HIM OR HER and who CARES WHAT YOU THINK!" We will always be at a disadvantage.